Never thought I'd be bored relaxing...

Well, that's what happens when you are forced to sit in a recliner all day for 4 days straight and try not to walk as much as possible. I'm glad I took those 4 days to recuperate cause I'm starting to see improvements with my leg. Oh and I found out that it's the gastrocnemius muscle that I sprained in the back of my calf.

On Thursday, after waking up from an adventure at the ER that I discuss in my previous entry, I tried to move around and get to a place that was comfy. And that place turned out to be my recliner. I tilted it back as far as I could, stacked 3 pillows under my leg and alternated ice and heat under my calf (mostly ice cause the heat seemed to cause slight pain) and watched endless amounts of tv and movies.

Oh and I followed that regime all the way through Sunday. Now you may be thinking, "you lucky dog, you!" but you, my friend, would be oh so wrong. When you are unable to walk without hobbling and the use of crutches, you suddenly become aware of how often you get up from a chair to go, let's say for instance, pee! Such an ordeal! No joke! It takes so much time and effort to get yourself standing, hobble to the bathroom and then make your way back to the chair and reconfigure yourself back into a comfy position. Even though I'm not able to run right now I'm sure I sweated the calories with just having to get in and out of my chair.

Thankfully I have some very wonderful and entertaining friends who attempted to keep my spirits up with mid-day calls and late night babbling (thanks Trish and Jeff...you 2 are aweshum!)

So the improvements I mentioned earlier...well, on Thursday and Friday I couldn't even have my left (the injured one) foot flat on the floor while standing. And don't get me started on the automatic tendency to stretch my legs! ouch! One night I woke up thinking I had a charlie horse in my muscle and freaking that I was unable to work it out, but I think I was stretching my leg in my sleep and pulled it too far. eep! So finally late Saturday and all day Sunday I attempted to put my foot flat on the floor while standing... and I could do it! Leg wasn't straight though and there was a slight twinge of pain but it's definitely better than before.

So I'm still working on getting it healed and see my PCP in 2 weeks for a follow up. Will know more then if I can participate in the half marathon. I'm still trying to remain calm with that and tell myself it's ok if I can't (thanks again Trish for your encouragement on that issue). Oh one other thing, sitting in ones apartment for 4 days straight and depressed with the fact that your goal might not happen makes one want sugar in a bad way! But I was very good and didn't have any! Even if I can't run the half I'm still planning on going to Disneyland to support my mom and brother and after the race my mom will get her pretzel with cheese and I will still have my victory (for staying off sugar) churro!

Ramble ramble ramble ... yep, rats me right now...sigh. It was good to be back at work though my desk is covered and it's hard to not stay at my desk as I print a lot and the printer is in the other room. *we-oh we-oh we-oh" <-- that's my pity party violin...it's needs some tuning. ahahahahaha

mur

Everything was fine and dandy yesterday, even though Mrs Boss and I worked till 11:30 last night. But at about 11 is when the sadness and pain hit. As you know I've been training for a half marathon, well last night may have cost me that race ... and the delish churro at the end of it. Long story short I ran 2 steps in our building hallway at work and heard and then really felt a "POP". I had been reading about calf muscle strains recently cause my left calf had been in slight pain/soreness for about a day or two. I kept looking for the signs if I had a Grade 4 tear which would mean blood would start filling my toes. So far no discoloration. My boss went with me to the Emergency Room....which I rarely, if never go....for myself that is.

At the ER we of course waited and waited, but we are very entertainable and she did her best to keep things light and funny. Finally I saw the doc and after some minor tests of strength and pressure he determined that I tore/strained my g-whatchamacallit-muscle and I'm to rest and not use that leg for at least 2 weeks. He gave me a pair of crutches and now I'm hobblin around my apartment. Thankfully I don't have a lot of furniture and it's a pretty big place.

So I can't train for 2 weeks minimum...could be more but I gotta remember to take it slow and not overdo. Boss even said that at work I'm to sit in my chair and that's it...make the rest of the office get stuff for me. To some this sounds wonderful, but for independent-I like to do things on my own-doesn't rely on anyone-me, this is gonna be rough.

So there ya have it. This is why at almost 2 a.m. this morning I wrote status of "is very sad". But honestly I'm more than sad...I'm "in the depths of despair" :-(

Oh and don't get me started on how I drive my stick-shift truck with an injured left leg .... ugh!

$5 for a churro?! You're outta your mind!

Okay....I've made a decision.  To help strengthen me for the half marathon I've decided to not eat any sweets (candy, cookies, cake, ice cream *gulp*, all things sugary and delicious) until the race is over.  I started this on Monday the 12th of July (yesterday) and so far it's been tough.  I have a huge sweet tooth with ice cream being my weakness, and our office has bowls of candy everywhere. 

BUT!!! I also have made a decision that right after I'm done with the race ... okay and proabably after I take a shower or two to get all the sweat and dirt off and maybe take a short nap I'm going straight into Disneyland and I"m getting myself a churro!  and maybe an ice cream treat from The Gibson Girl Ice Cream Parlor on Main Street ... but definitely a churro!  As my friend Jeff said, "It's fried dough!"  and then I reply with "covered in cinnamon and sugar!" YUM!

Oh and just to prepare you, I may be a little irritable for a few days or weeks with going through sugar detox.   This decision will not only help me nutritionally and physically, but I do believe it will also help me mentally during the race.  After every mile I pass I'll think "yay! only so many more miles till a churro!!!"  It's  the little things that get me going and I'm probably being very silly about this whole thing, but oh well!

Let's all go to the lobby...

... cause lately these movies have stunk!  Is it just me or have romatic comedies always been so predictable and not very good?  Perhaps I've just reached a point in my life where they don't get me teary-eyed and saying "OMG that was the best ever!".  I find that these style of movies do not hold my attention very long and start rolling my eyes in the middle of them.  And don't get me started on Nikolas "yes a main character is going to die in my movie" Sparks.  GAH! Why are his movies all Romeo and Juliet based?  2 people find each other, drama drama drama, they fall in love, everything seems to be going super great and then ... PLOP...dead.  geesh!

(500) Days of Summer, Away We Go, any movie based on a Jane Austen book ... these are the types (to name a few) of movies I wanna watch in the romatical department.  Or just give me the action/adventure, shoot em up, running around the world trying to save it type! yeah! Iron Man, Star Trek, Hellboy, Gladiator, Bourne trilogy...you get the idea.

So, yeah, that's my view on these very important matters.  Of course there are plenty of other genres that I love watching, but this particular one is fresh in my mind as I watched a romantic comedy last night and was bored.

Spark Your Heart 5k

On July 4, 2010 I finished my first 5k! Well, techinically that's not true.  I once walked a 5k with friends back in 1999 or was it 2000? .. anyways, it wasn't timed and I was just having fun walking the route with my friends Jody and Rebecca.  So for me, this was the completion of my first timed and official (for me) 5k! YAY ME! hahaha

Here's the scoop:  I went to visit my mom in Bend, Oregon for the 4th of July weekend and had a blast! Mother-daughter time is always fun!  We went and saw Toy Story 3 on Saturday the 3rd (if you haven't seen it yet, GO!) and walked the route for the 5k that was happening the next day.  It's a very beautiful trail as it takes you around a river that quite a few people were drifting down on tubes, rafts, canoes, just about anything and everything!  Afterwards we had a light supper of salads at Red Robin and went back home to get some rest and be prepared to wake up at 6 a.m. for the race.

On the 4th, just after 7 a.m. we arrived at the scene and there were quite a few people already present.  For the timed people there were 394 that competed that day, but there were some that didn't want to be timed so the number overall is greater.  It was slightly chilly that morning as there was a breeze, but I figured once I got running it was gonna get pretty warm.  Finally at about 5 till 8 they had us line up at the starting line.  And then **BBBBRRRRRAAAAAAMMMMMMM** (that's the sound of the air horn they used to tell us to go).  I was not ready for what was gonna happen next. 

Okay, let me back up a bit.  When I go out for my scheduled runs/walks at home I start out at a nice pace.  Not too slow, but at a good brisk walk to get me going and then I start running.  On this particular morning for this race there was no easing into it.  Everyone just darted off and I was swept away with the crowd trying to figure out what exactly was going on!  I was seriously surprised, but I guess it helped get me going.  At one point I got discouraged because we had stupidly placed ourselves near the very front of the start line which meant that TONS of people passed us.  I ran for about a mile or so without slowing but realized that I needed to slow down.  So I did.  Told mom to just keep going and not to wait up for me.  We all have our own personal best we want to beat and I knew she had hers.

I continued at a steady pace and made my way around the river.  At one point I could see the finish line and people were already crossing it.  Another moment of feeling discouraged.  I had to give myself a pep talk that I need to concentrate on myself and the people that were finishing have obviously been in races many times before and I had only been training for about 3 weeks.  As I kept going there were people monitoring the trail and on occasion one would say "you're doing great!" or "you can do it!".  Seriously, those help soooo much!  The encouragement on the route and everything really keeps me positive. 

OH! I have to stop and just say that running makes me way too emotional.  Even know recapping what happened I'm starting to get teary eyed.  sigh.  So throughout the race I would find myself taking gulps meaning I was about to cry and had to tell myself to stop.  That's all I need, to burst into tears as I'm running down the road.  Silly Holly.  And just to let you in on a little secret, the same thing happens even during my daily routes. 

So finally I was getting closer and closer to the finish.  They made us run right past the finish line and go around the stage/park area which sucked cause I kept thinking "it's right there! let me pass!".  But I kept going and decided I was going to run the rest of the way and run across that finish line.  Mom had already crossed and thankfully met me at one point to give me some water.  They didn't have any water stops throughout the whole thing....not very nice of them.  And then, all of a sudden, I DID IT!!! I FINISHED!!! (and here come the tears! seriously, right now I'm tearing up...GAH! lol)

I came in at 42:48, 343 out of 394 and 20 out of 24 in my age catagory.  Not bad for my first time!  Mom finished at 40:27 so I wasn't too far behind.  This is me and Mom after the race was over...I would've removed my visor, but I had "visor hair" and it's not pretty!  And yes, we matched! lol

After everything was over, the two of us went to breakfast with a few of my mom's friends who were also in the 5k.  Fran (who won 1st place in her age catagory!) and Susanne and their husbands.  The guys met us at the Original Pancake House (super yummy-ness!) since they didn't run the race...I guess in our little group it was Ladies Day at the races! hahaha

Now onto the next and greatest challenge for me...the Half Marathon.  YIKES!

the moment

I have to remember the moment. I want to remember everything that led up to that moment. The way I felt, the words that were said and not said, the emotions of feeling connected to someone. Just being there and using words and feeling the emotion of the tones and touches. We got closer and closer, not know what to expect, but at the same time feeling very safe and wanted. I never dreamed nor thought this would be a moment or memory I would have. I wanted time to stop so I could savor what was happening. I didn't want it to end. I didn't want to wake up if it was all a dream, but it wasn't a dream. It was real and no one can take that moment away from me. The future is unknown, but that memory is mine to remember and keep forever.

Are you there God? It's me, Holly

I was asked yesterday about my blog and if/when I was going to update it again.  Life has decided to throw some curve balls my way and if you pay attention to my Facebook/Plurk/Twitter statuses then you would've seen my brief update (I erased it already) referring to how it feels that I'm getting beat up by this thing called life.  At the end of May and most recently here in June I've received some really difficult news about a family member and I"m trying to get my emotional and mental sides ready for what looks like to be a long haul.  I'm not going go into the details here.  Don't worry, I have a select few that I've entrusted this information to and they are the ones I vent, cry and laugh with about everything.  If you could just toss up a prayer, chant, happy thought, or whatever it is you believe in that would be awesome. 

My friend Jeff has introduced me to a movie called "Mary and Max".  This is an amazing movie about family and friends and just the toughness of life and at the end is the phrase that says something like God chooses our family members.  Thank God he lets us choose our friends.  You get the idea.  Oh, I love my family, but at times ... well, some of you know what I'm talking about...or at least implying. 

I'm also in the midst of training for the half marathon that is happening in September.  My mom has put together a schedule for me to follow and I'm very VERY thankful for her doing that.  Pretty much I get 2 days off per week to rest.  Otherwise I'm outside after work running around my neighborhood for about an hour so.  This past weekend she was able to come to town and we ran/walked our scheduled 4 miles and it was good.  I've been wanting to run along side her to get a sense of how her running habits are and the pace she keeps.  Tonight after work I'm going to circling my route about 3 times to get about 4 miles in.  I've realized that the first 1 1/2 to 2 miles is the toughest cause my body/legs are getting used to not sitting in a chair all day at the office, but then it seems that I fall into a stride and want to keep going.  Rain or shine I'm out on the days I'm scheduled.  And right now, it's been pretty chilly.  I don't think the Pacific Northwest got the memo that it is summer.  Oh well, it helps actually with the running as its not too hot. 

So, yeah.  That's where I'm at right now.  Work is keeping me really busy but it's steady and consistent which is really nice. 

Take care everyone and I'll get this blog thing updated as much as I can ... even with cryptic updates if need be.

Got to know when to hold em and know when to fold em

People come and go throughout my life. Some by circumstance, some I hope never leave, and some that I've realized it's time to move away from. The last part is at times difficult to do and face, but these people need to be told a final goodbye. A part of me wishes I would've never said hello, but then again that's life ... no regrets. You live and learn ... learning what to do next time and not ignore the warning signs.

I've recently had to say goodbye to a person that has been in and out of my life for quite some time. Wasn't an easy choice, but in the end it's going to save me from that little devil on my shoulder. It was time to fold.

Growing up is tough and I'm thankful for the people I've chosen to surround myself with, even if I have to take a plane trip to see them. I consider them my best friends and my family. Those are the ones I will hold onto.

2010 Half Marathon Update

Just an update on the marathon ... I'm now officially registered so it's do or die! Hopefully not die, but perhaps pass out after the race is done!   It hasn't really sunk in yet that I'm signed up to walk/run 13.1 miles this September, but that's what I'm going to do!  Getting out there to train has been difficult for me, but I'm slowly getting it together.  I walked/ran a mile the other day around a track in about 17 or so minutes and I'm planning on signing up for some local 5Ks in the next few weeks.  The Pacific NW has been under attack by rain storms which make me want to stay inside and snuggle under the blankets.  Someone give me a push out the door!  I have about 3 months to get my act together ... sigh

all fall down

Ah life ... how you love to torture me so.  Seems that when something good happens to me and I'm feeling all happy go lucky for a few a few days, you creep up from behind and either whap me upside the head or pull the rug out from under me.  I should invest in some of those spy glasses that allows me to see what's going on behind me.  Though then you'd prolly drop something from up above.  sigh.